The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack of will. ~Vince Lombardi
The Inner Critic lives!
What defines success to you? If you’re like most people, your definition was formed by your parents and society. This definition is internalized and became the measuring stick that our inner critic uses to prove what failures we are.
Our families are the major contributor to our subconscious idea of success… My family measures success with money.
“How much does it pay?”, “He’s doing well”, and “She has a great job” are common conversation openers when it comes to success. Eventually, this leads to “I hate my job, but” and “Nobody LIKES work”…
Doug and I think success is a personal measurement. What we feel is successful may not be the same for you. Doug thinks having a banana tree in the yard makes him a big deal… I couldn’t care less.
Defining our success
I decided to think about what success means to me. After stripping away what I’ve been told success is, money and status, I’m able to see my personal definition.
It’s inevitable that my personal definition resembles the one I was programmed with. What’s important though, is to look beyond our programming and embrace our authentic version of success.
I chipped away at my definition of success to reveal the true core that will guide me on my path to contentment. After thinking about what I found I came up with my personal “rules” of success:
My talents can be developed and used to make a living for me. They can also be used to help others who are stuck in life and are unsure about what to do.
I know I am successful in my career when I am content, feel useful, make a difference and bring home decent pay (it’s still there).
In order to have a fulfilling career I must feel like I’m doing something useful and making a difference. I have to be doing something that makes me get out of bed in the morning… Something that seems necessary and not just mindless plodding.
I will be successful when I stick with what I’m doing, when I follow through with my efforts. I’ll know I’m successful, career-wise, when I have a purpose, am interested in what I’m doing, am making a difference and being paid fairly.
Think about your definition of success. What were you taught success is by your family and society?
What is your authentic definition of success? To figure it out, ask yourself the following questions:
- What can my skills do for me?
- How do I know when I’m successful in my career?
- What does a job have to have for me to be content?
- What will it be like when I’m successful? How will I know I am?
Write down your answers and compare them to the definition your were taught. Are there similarities? Differences?
How much of your subconscious definition isn’t really true for you, once you really think about it?